Ever since I was young, I lived out my days with a slightly compulsive obsessive, perfectionistic view on how things should be. And, at the time, I excelled in living like this.
These days, I try not to be perfect. I try not control a situation. I try not to be compulsive obsessive.
It started when I discovered my love for drawing. I would spend hours at a time illustrating, focusing on capturing the finest details and colouring in between the lines. I was praised by my teachers and my parents for these paintings. Initially, as a child, this made me proud but as I got older, pleasing others in order to make myself feel validated gradually became second nature.
I learnt to apply this perfectionistic expectation of myself to all areas of my life from my study to work to my personal life. I wanted to be the best at everything I did.