A few years ago, I went through what can only be described as the most challenging year of my life. 2014 was a year where I was called to let go of all the things that I had been holding onto - emotionally, physically and mentally - so that I could grow and emerge a stronger person on the other side.
The year started with a relationship breakup in January. At the time, I was shattered by this. Not only was I deeply shocked and hurt, but I had been disappointed to start the new year in this way.
A lot of our energy is spent trying to make things go exactly how we want them to. So, we must release this control and desire for things to always go our way. This catalyst gave me permission to do exactly that.
It wasn’t easy. It first started with letting go of habits that no longer brought out the joy and lightness in me such as multi-tasking, saying yes to things because I felt obligated to, etc. I also let go of things that weren’t adding value to my life - physical objects and even relationships that were no longer bringing out the best in me.
Just because I’m an intuition coach doesn’t mean that I’m perfect at what I do. Even I can acknowledge that letting things go is a forever process and there’s still so much we’re constantly working on - whether it’s an emotional attachment to objects that aren’t bringing us joy or friendships that are taxing on us.
Whether you’re looking to let go, release, detach or declutter in any area of your life, here are 4 mindful lessons to letting things go:
Acknowledge that you will feel extreme emotions and accept that your feelings and perspective will change continuously through this process.
The process of accepting and grieving the end of my relationship and then moving on took a really long time. This act of letting go was one of the hardest things I have had to do as it took me on a seemingly, never-ending roller coaster ride of emotions.
Acknowledging this is necessary when we are in the process of growth. So sit with the discomfort, be observant without judgement and feel what you need to feel. Instead of keeping all your emotions buried below the surface, build the courage to release them so that you can move through it and grow even further.
Time will teach you that if the timing is right, the lesson will appear. At this point in time, we have all the necessary resources within us to take this lesson and grow from it. Surrender to the process without pushing, fighting against it or trying to control it.
Once you start to trust the process of letting things go - you will find yourself easing into it. Things became so easier and simpler when you aren’t trying to control your feelings. As you reflect, you might also become aware of the things you need to declutter from your life because it’ll feel heavy to keep holding onto these things.
Depending on the situation, detaching from people, experiences, things, memories and stories will take time. It can be a long process so it is important to be forgiving and gentle with yourself. When I came out of my relationship, my heart was closed off to the rest of the world for a long time. I was so fearful of opening up and being vulnerable that it also stifled my authentic voice.
If you’re scared to open your heart again, practise self-care and doing things you love. For me, I invested my energy into writing, drawing, creating, learning and connecting with friends. These things gave you a channel to express yourself authentically so you can gain back your inner confidence.
Sometimes we displace our emotional energy onto physical things. And then, we hold onto these things because of their sentimental value. As you begin decluttering, you’ll realize that sometimes having less is more. I know I did. When I moved into a small apartment, there was simply not enough space for a lot of the things that I owned.
So, I began hacking away at my pile of giveaway clothes and items until eventually getting rid of them from my life. When you declutter down to owning only the things you truly need - the things that bring you joy - the energy that emanates from your decluttered space will be refreshing and liberating.